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Linda Barrett

Linda Barrett

Linda Barrett

Starting Over ~ Speaking about Breast Cancer…

HERE COMES OCTOBER…  Br Ca Blog icon 1

This year the month of October is especially busy for me. Not only am I promoting two new books, but it’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and I’m scheduled to speak to several groups. Some are interested in learning more about this cancer in general. Others are specifically interested in the genetic connection and how this disease is passed down from generation to generation in some families. We’ve spoken here about my own experience with breast cancer.

Today, however, I thought it would be fun to let you know what went on behind the scenes before I made my first presentation this past Sunday.  Hadassah luncheon 010You might say it was a last minute frenzy…at least for me. After thanking the audience–about sixty people–for having me as their guest, I shared with them the same story I’m sharing with you now:

I had written and revised  my talk over several weeks and thought I was ready for prime time. But on the day before the presentation, a friend approached me and said, “Tell me your joke.”

“Excuse me?  What are you talking about?”

“If you’re making a speech,” he said, “you need to start with a joke. That’s the rule.”

I stared at him hard. “Do I look like Tina Fey? I don’t write jokes, just books.”

“Oh-h-h,” he said. “Then I wish you very good luck. You’ll need it.”  And he walked away.

Did I want to hear this?  But when I got home, I made a bee-line for my writing cave. This is the place where brilliant thoughts are supposed to rain down like manna from heaven. I sat at the computer, fingers on the keyboard and waited for brilliance. And I waited. And waited until I was so frustrated, I was ready to tear my hair out.

Tear my hair out?

“Idiot!” I said to myself. “You’ve already done that twice. And you didn’t like it. The third time is not going to be a charm.”

My hands were back on the keyboard. And my brain was flickering. I decided that breast cancer is like politics. A very lopsided subject. First it’s left. Then it’s right. God  knows, there’s no middle.  And like politicians, the ta-tas can’t be trusted. Now you see them. Then you don’t. They take off to fight some battles, and when they return, you notice that their territory might be a bit different, but still recognizable.

Next I decided not to worry about making any jokes. I knew that if I just put my breast foot forward, I’d be all right.

Hadassah luncheon 001

And that was exactly what I told that first audience before thanking them for letting me get this off my chest…such as it is.

My original talk followed this introduction, and for me, was a huge relief.

Hadassah luncheon 006

 

What I learned from this is that comedy is harder than tragedy, and that Tina Fey can sleep easy. She has nothing to worry about from me!

Happily, I was also able to distribute pamphlets on inherited breast cancer which were provided by FORCE – Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered. This is the only non-profit foundation in the country whose mission is solely to educate and raise fund for the research of inherited breast and ovarian cancer.

FORCE LOGO

FORCE LOGO

As always, thank so much for stopping by. I hope to see you for the next edition of Starting Over–which is this Thursday. REALEASE DAY for Hopefully Every After. A new contest will begin on Thursday, so please be sure to visit 🙂

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Look for Hopefully Ever After on October 3rd!

Available October 3rd

Available October 3rd

 

 

Starting Over ~ Life in the Day Camp

BLING’S THE THING…and don’t forget the hats….  

It's all about the hats!

It’s all about the hats!

Girlfriends, girlfriends, girlfriends….Life in this busy retirement community would fall flat without girlfriends. Come to think of it, life anywhere would fall flat without our women friends. When you need a trusted listener, who do you call? When you want cohorts for a shopping trip, who do you call?  Even when you simply want to share time over a cup of coffee, who do you call?  You call your girlfriends. Of course. The more the merrier.

Earlier this week, the Girlfriends group where I live reached the magic number of 200 members. A party was in order!  A party to bling up our name badges–including mine–which had just arrived in the mail. To add to the fun, we were supposed to wear vintage hats.  Prizes in different categories would be awarded. Add a few bottles of wine, a little nosh, and away we go. It’s party time.

As you might guess, I have been so nose-deep with the publishing of Hopefully Ever After, writing this blog and writing new stories, that I’m barely able to keep track of all the goings-on in my community. However, my girlfriends didn’t let me forget about the bling party. But as for hats? Fugeddaboutit!  At least for me. But some of the ladies really looked wonderful. In fact, we could have opened a vintage haberdashery 🙂

Girlfriends' group 002

Robyn and Marsha in their beautiful chapeaux

And there were stories–touching stories–behind the beauty of the hats. Several belonged to moms who had passed away. I found it so lovely that daughters held onto a particular hat of their mother’s. What significance did they hold? Mostly the attachment elicited general memories of mom wearing and loving a specific hat. On the right, above, the smaller hat is from the ’50 with a net that goes down over the forehead like a close fitting veil. My friend, Marsha, lamented that she grew up too late for her mom’s hat to be in fashion. So she wears it now.

A particular hat caught my eye because it came with a “snood” attached in the back which is used to hold long hair in a bun-type arrangement on the neck. Carolyn, a new friend of mine, is the gal wearing the gorgeous black chapeau and certainly did it more justice than my photos did:

Girlfriends' group 004Girlfriends' group 005

The head gear certainly garnered attention, but I can’t forget about the blinging of the name tags. My friend, Chris, who’s also in our book club, took pity on my inability to use a glue gun and decorated my name tag for me. I stood over her shoulder, watching. She’s good, but I heard her say “ouch” a time or two. So, thank you very much, Chris.

Girlfriends' group 009

 

My nametag is now officially blinged.

My nametag is now officially blinged.

 

You might have read another blog I’d written about the girlfriend’s group. We had fun that night, too, seeing how we could follow a leader and learn how to drum, not with sticks, but with our hands on drums we held between our knees. Who knew I’d discover rhythm?  So although I’d never before belonged to any group without a “noble” purpose like raising money for a worthy cause, I must admit that once in awhile it’s good to just have fun. I think I’ll stick around and enjoy girl-time with my friends.

I bet we all have friends going back decades who are very dear to us. I know I do. But they’re not next door anymore. Not even in the next state! I’m lucky to have found women who are openhearted and fun. Most important, they want to make new friends in their new home. If you’ve got a group of girlfriends–large group or tiny, from years past or present–please share your stories right here. Girlfriends rock!

As always, thank you so much for stopping by. I hope to see you for the next edition of Starting Over.

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P.S.  I hope you’ll be on the look-out for HOPEFULLY EVER AFTER It will be available for ebooks on Thursday, October 3rd and in print at about the same time, maybe a bit later.

 

Available October 3rd

Available October 3rd

 

 

Starting Over ~ A Book Club Evening

IN THE SPOTLIGHT–                

From my own book shelves, authors Emily Giffin, Bridget Asher, Barbara O'Neal

From my own book shelves, authors Emily Giffin, Bridget Asher, Barbara O’Neal

“I just love this type of book!”

When I heard those words at my book club Tuesday night, my heart sang. I felt myself smile. The woman was talking about MY kind of book. The kind I read and write. The type that appeals to women, explores family relationships, and provides an emotional ride based on a what-if reality. What if your child isn’t on the school bus at the end of the day?  What if you discover your husband has been having an affair? What if you find out you and your husband can’t have children?  What if a couple decides not to have children but one of them changes their mind? (Baby Proof by Emily Giffin).  What would you do in these situations? You can safely find out in the pages of a book as you struggle along with the characters who are facing these issues.

I love the James Bond stories. But, c’mon. Half the fun of James and his ladies is the eye candy. As for the plot – we  ride in the most nifty cars escaping the bad guys. It’s a hoot to watch, but then we go back to our everyday issues in our ordinary world.

Except sometimes a woman’s ordinary world is rocked, and that is the premise for the genre I’ve been talking about here: Women’s Fiction. In these novels, we follow the female protagonist’s journey through rocky waters as she navigates to her next plateau. Sometimes, a love interest might surprise her. ( Open House by Elizabeth Berg). She might be surrounded by a “cast of thousands,” — relatives, neighbors, co-workers — but it’s basically her story.

More from my shelves: authors Kathryn Shay, Barbara Delinsky and Elizabeth Berg.

More from my shelves: authors Kathryn Shay, Barbara Delinsky and Elizabeth Berg.

On Tuesday evening, I had a special interest in the book club discussion. The group–about twenty participants–had read Family Interrupted. My novel.  Disclaimer: the choice was not my idea. A few months ago, a new book list was being developed and boom! It was included. On the other hand, I didn’t nix the suggestion. As the proverbial fly on the wall, I thought I’d get some insights and discover how readers truly reacted both to the story itself and to the writing. Maybe I’d learn lessons I could apply to my next book.

Well, the fly-on-the-wall idea worked for about the first fifteen minutes. I kept my mouth shut, didn’t make eye contact with anyone, and actually wondered for how much longer I could play the part of a robot. It’s really hard trying to avoid eye contact for that long especially when sitting in a big square formation with people to the right, left and across.

I had wanted to disappear, have the gals to forget I was in the room and just listen as they talked about book. What a dumb idea that was! First of all, it didn’t work. After fifteen minutes, I joined the conversation. We were talking about family issues, after all, and I have opinions, too. I’m used to participating every month. Second of all – and this is more important – I sensed that these readers wanted me involved. This seemed logical to me. After all, how many times would a real, live author be present at these meetings? How many times would these readers be able to ask questions directly to the author of a book they’d just read?

So away we went. Some of the discussion followed the questions I’d provided at the back of the book. Why did the characters do this or that? Questions were raised about the story couple’s marriage. Readers wanted to know how I came up with the idea. And one admitted, “You made me grab for tissues several times!” Good. An author wants to tap into a reader’s emotions, wants the reader to care about the characters.

The question that came from me, the one  I always love to ask is, “What do you think happens after the book ends?” We actually talked about a sequel which amazed me because I’d never had that in mind! As an author who worries about everything, and who knows the issues I had to confront when writing the book, I asked a question that no one else considered important at all. “Did the verb tenses work? Did you get confused as time flashed back and then back again?” Verb tenses ate my lunch as I wrote the book (which is one reason I hire an editor). And yet,  here in front of my eyes, these gals laughed at me.

So I learned once more that a good story wins every time. And that I worry too much. I don’t think, however, that I’ll ever stop.

This one's also on my shelf! And in my e-reader.

This one’s also on my shelf! And in my e-reader.

As always, thank you so much for stopping by. I hope to see you for the next edition of Starting Over.

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P.S.  I’ll be sending out a newsletter on October 3rd.  If you’d like to get it–right into your in-box–you can sign up for it here on the website.